Twelve Different Times
by peppyrainbow
Summary: Star documents her attempts to reveal her true feelings to her best friend.
1. Attempt 1

Saturday morning. She would rather be asleep, curled under the covers with her blond hair peeking out and fanning around her pillow, but the excitement of pursuing her plans for the day made her get up off of bed and check the calendar. She blinked several times, her eyes landing on the pink calendar with events and news written on it with glitter pen ink.

November 13th. Her own personal doomsday... but not really. Star decided to tell Marco her deepest darkest secret... the one that involved him. The one that made her the person that lied when they played truth or punishment a while back. When asked her crush, Star said Oskar- because she thought it was him she liked, right?

Wrong.

At least, she thought she was wrong... or right. She admired Oskar, but like Marco said about Jackie, maybe she just liked the image of him. Maybe she just put him on a pedestal and her own fantasies about him driven the crush. That she never really got to know the real Oskar. If she really loved him, she'd love him for all he is. Flaws, traits, everything.

Her relationship with Marco, however, was a lot deeper. When they first met, she made a ton of mistakes- and she practically weirded him out. But he still saved her when Ludo was going to attack her and steal the wand. He forgave her and offered to be her friend. And she-

"What are you thinking about, Star?" Glossirick's voice interrupted her. He was watching her this whole time. He swooped up from inside the pages of her spell book and met her face to face. "You must be thinking of Marco, right? Am I right?"

"No!" She shrieked. And blushed.

"Star?" Her heart practically stopped. She knew that beautiful voice. It was Marco, and his voice just reminded her of the impending doom. How her feelings will be spilled out like a jar of glittery paste. "Are you okay?"

"Y-yeah, Marco! Everything's fine!"

"Okay, but I swear I heard you scream-"

"It's fine, Marco." She was hurling out words like spitfire. Too fast. But she was also too scared.

"Um, okay. But just-ugh-okay."

Okay.

Star breathed a sigh of relief when she didn't hear anything else. She sighed, and flopped her head on the bed. Glossirick hovered over her face, confused and amused. He opened his mouth to say something, but she closed his mouth with her hand.

"Go away." Star narrowed her eyes. "No." He slipped out from her restraint, and crossed his arms. "Not until you tell me what's going on. Is today the day, Star? Are you going to tell him today?"

"It's none of your business, Glossirick. Go back inside the spellbook, where you belong."

"But, Star, I really want to know. You've liked him for so long. I remember your entry-chapter 11, was it?-you fell in love with him when you saw his karate moves or whatever. When he saved you from one of Ludo's henchmen. That it occurred to you that this boy wasn't some ordinary earthling. And your souls are intertwined, from the blood moon ball. You didn't think I'd forget about that, do you? I know you haven't." He was right, she hadn't forgotten. But that gave him no excuse to look through her diary like that.

"My entries," She yells, "Are none of your business!"

Big mistake. She shouldn't have yelled, because here comes the object of her affections now, climbing up the stairs. With every time he said "Star!", she panicked. She ran into her closet and locked the door.

She stared Glossirick right into his little green face. She sighs again.

Her sweating hands fumble for her diary. When her hands familiarize themselves with the small notebook, she grabs a nearby pen and her flashlight. She switches it on, feeling Glossirick's presence behind her.

"Not today, huh?" He says.

She doesn't answer.

November 13th

Dear Diary,

I'm not sure if I should go through with telling Marco that I love him. I mean, it's a big step, right? It would ruin our friendship. What if he doesn't like me back? How would I deal with the rejection? Sleeping in the same house as him would be even more awkward! I mean, there I would be, waking up to get breakfast and eyes would meet. He would look awkwardly down and my heart would sink to its knees. We'd be ruined forever.

And even if he does like me, how would Mr. and Mrs. Diaz react? Their son dating the random princess they had only gotten a small amount of time to get to know. And what about our classmates? And Tom? It would be a mess.

Should I? Can I? I don't know anymore.

-Princess Star Butterfly, heir to Mewni

She closed the book, placed it beside her, and slunk down on the wall. Glossirick flew over and hovered beside her, looking concerned. A flood of tears rolled down her cheeks, and he gave her a tissue. She dabbed at her today be the day? She looked over at Glossirick, who frowned. "So..." He says. "You gonna tell him right now?" Today? Will she finally tell him today?

Her eyes cast down, and she thought about how heavily her heart beat whenever Marco was around. How her spirits soared whenever he smiled at her. And how she melts at his attempts to cheer her up.

She thought about how cute he was, with his confectionary caramel skin and lavish brown hair and matching, gorgeous eyes. She thought of his cool karate moves and cooking abilities and the one thing she wished he'd say to her.

Te amo, Mi Princessa.

She sighs for the final time and looked over at a picture of Marco, holding a karate tournament trophy that he won about a week ago.

And she shivers.

"No." She says. And meant it. Today was not the day. "I don't think I could do it."

She then runs over to turn off the lights, climbs back into bed, and cries herself to sleep, even though it's 11:45 A.M.


	2. Attempt 2: Sort Of

Her alarm woke her up abruptly on Monday morning.

Star would've preferred to sleep longer hours, but the secondary school system's run times are long and brutal. Even when you want to lay in bed and mope about a broken heart. A broken heart that you can't pick up the pieces as they trail behind you, falling and falling until they make a path of supposed happiness in the end.

She didn't actually sleep from 11:45 A.M until 6:00 A.M, because that's basically impossible for her, given the state she's in. She woke up at about 12:30 on the dot, and spent the rest of the day doing homework and avoiding Marco, whom had been incredibly suspicious about her behavior. But whatever. It's for his own good, and hers too. If he ever found out, she'd never live it down.

In other words- she's in deep trouble, man.

"Ready to go, Star?" Marco barges in the room, clad in his usual red hoodie and jeans. One she's seen thousands of times. But for some reason, today it looked a thousand times better to her than any other day.

"Yeah, hold on." She grabbed her backpack and shoved her wand in there, then looked in her long mirror for any splotches or messes on her face. Lastly, she smoothed out her dress. After, she walked slowly toward Marco and nodded to the best of her ability, trying not to look distant but also trying not to look him in the eyes. His brown, beautiful orb eyes. "Okay, we can go now."

The walk to school felt long, too. Star wanted to teleport there, if she could. But she can't teleport despite her being able to use magic and do some other incredible things. Because despite being allowed to do all that, teleportation wasn't possible. She can't even fly!

She felt Marco's eyes on her as she walked, so she focused on her feet as they hit the ground and lifted themselves up.

It wasn't until the halfway mark on their path to school that Marco finally said something. "Look, Star, I don't know that's going on with you, but you've been acting really strange lately. Is something up?" His brow furrowed.

Star ignored him. She walked faster.

"Star, I know this isn't you, if you just-"

And faster.

"Star, please!"

She's ahead of him now.

"Seriously, Star, what is wrong with you? I need to know-"

She starts to run. Faster and faster until she headed inside the school building. And even after that, she kept running until she enters her first period class.

Once she got inside the classroom, she flopped her head on her desk and tuned out the world as best as she could. But her head perked up as she heard the news of a school dance.

"Everyone's going." Marco's crush, Jackie said coolly. "And practically everyone is going to bring a date." Her eyes landed at the entrance, and Star groaned when she saw that it was indeed Marco. And it hit her that she was going to ask him.

She can't let that happen.

"I'm taking myself." Janna added. "'Cause I don't need a boy when I got myself to keep me company." She struck a pose, and a few people including Jackie clapped.

The rest of the class discussed what dresses or suits they'll wear, who they're going with. But all Star could think of was how to stop Jackie from asking out Marco without breaking Marco's heart or being mean to Jackie or causing trouble of any kind. It felt selfish, given how long Marco was probably waiting to let this happen, but she just couldn't let Jackie ask him out. It was as if she had to hearts to sacrifice, hers or Marco's. Tough choice.

"Hey, Star." Jackie strolls over to Star's desk and flashes a grin. She gives Jackie her classic poker face.

"Yes?" She just wanted to go home.

"Who are you taking to the dance?"

"Uh..." Star turned red and played with her nails. "Well.. I... uh..."

"Ooh, I know who she wants to take!" Janna runs over to Star and smiles. "It's so obvious."

Star's heart starts to beat so fast and loud. "No... I... um..."

"Oskar Greyson!" Jackie pipes up. "You said you liked him, remember?"

She sighed with relief. No one knew who she really liked. They all still thought she liked Oskar Greyson. Oh, how wrong they were, but it was a good thing. If they knew the truth, it would get real awkward around here, really fast.

So, they can't know.

"Star!" Marco rushed over to her desk. "Listen! I'm serious, what is up?" He started to look... angry. Like a I'm-worried-about-you-but-you-aren't-listening-to-me type of angry. She had to think of an excuse... fast.

Star panicked again. What can she even say?

"Oh... um... I just feel... bad about... um... stuff." Smooth.

Marco looked at Janna and Jackie. They shrugged. Marco turned back to her, cocking his head.

"It's nothing." Star shrugged a little, to prove that it wasn't anything serious. "Nothing you need to worry about. Just go sit down."

Marco sighed. "Well...okay, Star. But just know that I'm right here if you need to talk-"

"Class, welcome back to another dreadful day at school." The teacher flounced in right before the bell. Star sighed with relief once more and the teacher provided the distraction she needed to ward Marco away. "Now take out your homework."

Everyone groaned, and Star reached over to her backpack, pulled out her homework, and tried to focus in this class. But it became hard.

She overheard Jackie whispering with Marco. She balled her fists, glaring at a point on her teacher's desk. She's never gotten jealous before. But this time just might be her first.

She's dealt with space monsters, Ludo and his men, Toffee, her wand being destroyed among other things, but this was different. This was new. She had to share her Marco with the world, it seemed.

But Jackie Lynn Thomas wasn't about to steal Marco away from her. And as she pretended to listen to the teacher droning on and on, she thought of a plan. A fool-proof one. One that will help mend her heart again and finally spill the beans before it was too late.


	3. Attempt 3: Preparation

"Dance is tonight!" Britney Wong and her annoying army of cheerleaders paraded the school. They shook their pom-poms. "Wahoo!"

Ugh. This soon? Star made a face.

But whatever. Star's "plan" was about to be put in motion. She felt the taste of heartbreak and unsolvable confusion two days ago, and while it still lingered in her heart, it didn't hurt as much. Besides, she couldn't drag herself down today. She had another person to drag.

Jackie Lynn Thomas.

She felt bad, but their friendship was fun while it lasted. She remembered all those fun times she and Marco hung out with Jackie and a tag-along Janna, which constituted of Marco... drooling... over Jackie.

Never mind. Double ugh.

Her plan was to hack the school's projector and computer and upload an ugly sixth grade photo of Jackie that she stole from Janna's open locker.

Why Janna even had that photo was beyond her.

Anyhow, The projector would display it on the school's wide screen presentation device/thingy mah bob and the whole school would see. The projector would display it on the school's wide screen presentation device/thingy mah bob and the whole school would see. She'd be so embarrassed that she'd run out of the dance and out of the school. And with Jackie gone, she can whisk Marco away and tell him everything.

Star sighed. Okay, so when Star thought fool-proof, this doesn't qualify. But her heart was at stake.

For the rest of the day, Star was extra-nice to Jackie. She gave her parts of the school lunch that she didn't like, and she let Jackie budge her at the lunch line. She gave her a couple complements about her new skateboard (her regular skateboard was stolen a week ago), as well as a few other things. She felt that, by doing all of these good deeds, it would make up for what she was going to do tonight.

When she came back inside her house, exhausted from all the kindness she bestowed upon her skateboarding friend, she realized that Marco was coming down the stairs, as she saw his cute brown hairs sticking out the top of the banister, as he was peaking out. He had spent the day at home, because he missed the bus and his parents already went to work.

He was definitely trying to talk to her. And with the entire week spent avoiding him, it was time to end it all.

She was going to talk to him.

"Star, we need to talk-"

"I know." She watched as he stumbled a little on one of the stairs and gripped the banister. He ran to her.

When he reached the end of the stairs, he started panting, bending over to catch his breath.

"Marco, you okay there?" Star said, wearily.

"Yeah." He came to her, slowly, arms drooping, then stood right up. "But you certainly aren't."

She frowned. "What do you mean?" But she knew.

"I know why you're mad at me."

"But I'm not mad at you-"

"Star!" She's never seen him this frustrated. It kinda... scared her. A little. "Just...listen to me."

She nodded, but stepped back a little.

He sighed, deciding to start from today. He told her that Jackie had asked him to the dance, and he accepted. That he forgot that they usually go to every school event together, and that this time was an accidental exception,

The look on Star's face was devastating. Poor star child.

She stepped back, shaking her head furiously. "No... You... you... we were supposed to..."

"I know. But you'll let me go, right? You'll let me go with her. I have to, Star. You know how much I wanted this."

Of course she knew. But he didn't exactly know how he felt about Jackie at all. He put her on a pedestal, like he said. Maybe his real feelings don't lie with Jackie, but with someone else. But youth made him blind, as it did to Star, only with Star she found out sooner.

"I know you're mad because she asked me, and I didn't get to go with you."

Bingo.

"But at least you'll let me go with Jackie. The girl I've had feelings for a long time. And the opportunity finally comes for me." He came to her, face to face. "And being the supportive girl you are, you'll say yes, right? I know you will. You support me in everything."

Not this time.

"I don't own you, Marco. You can go wherever you want. Heck, if you want to propose to her, you don't need my consent. You can slide that ring right on her little pale finger." She huffed, clearly furious.

He looked half-happy, half-concerned, "So-"

"Yes, Marco! Yes you can freaking go with Jackie Lynn Thomas! And you can leave me here, alone."

"W-what? What about, um-"

"I don't like Oskar anymore. Now, either get out of here or leave me the hell alone." She ran up to her room, and for the billionth time, she slammed the door.

Her spellbook was open, and the noise she made woke up Glossaryck. He rubbed his eyes. "What happened?"

"Nothing."

She flopped on the bed, closed her eyes. When a few minutes have passed, she took out her journal and wrote:

 _6:00 P.M. That's in one hour._

 _I have to do this. I have to make sure Jackie stays away from him. This will ensure my happiness._

 _But then, why do I feel so guilty?_


	4. Note

_**All I'm gonna say here is thank you for the support.**_

 _ **Y'all are amazing. Each and every one of you. I love you all. You made this the biggest story I've ever published on this site. For that, I thank you.**_

 _ **Again, keep being awesome, and I couldn't be more grateful for you guys. When I first published this, I thought it looked kinda... cliche. Or dumb. But the support I have from you guys kept it going. So, thanks again!**_

 _ **-Samira**_


	5. Attempt 4: Guilt and Melancholy

Star was never more eager to throw on her dress. Her heels and jewelry and a little lip gloss. All the girly get up that girls will wear and judge and gossip about each other. Gross, it's like prom.

She actually did get to go with Oskar, at the last minute. She called him up at the last minute, turns out he was lonely and needed a date, so that's when she made her move. Nothing worse than looking desperate and alone at a high school dance.

She already set everything up, bribed a couple kids.

This wasn't like her.

But she had to. She had no choice.

She loved him.

"Star!" Marco said. "You're.. going?" He sounded as if this was suspicious.

"Yeah." Star said coolly, she felt so guilty inside however. "I'm... going."

"Oh..." He looked down. Guilt, guilt, guilt.

Jackie emerged from the kitchen, looking at the two. "What's going on?"

"Nothing!" They said at the exact same time, their eyes descending to the ground again.

Jackie frowned. "Um... okay." She grabbed Marco's arm and pulled him out of the door. "Let's go, dude."

Star watched the two go, watching Marco's movements, how he held the car door for Jackie and gave her a cute little smile. How she giggled and went in the car, bumping into Marco. Mr. and Mrs. Diaz swooning.

She looked back at the house, uncertain, then ran to the car, squishing herself beside Marco, and Jackie.

Stupid Jackie.

Marco frowned. "Uh, Star, where's Oskar?"

She shrugged. "He's coming." And that was the end of that.

The car ride was awkward. Jackie tried to start some conversation but to no avail. Jackie just kept looking at the two afterwards, frowning. She had absolutely no idea what was going on.

When they parked, Star ran for the gym, her pale legs dashing behind her.

"Star seems pretty excited." Jackie chuckled, half-heartedly. She pulled Marco into the gymnasium, running. "Let's try to beat her in there. Last one in is a rotten egg!"

"Jackie, stop!" Marco yelled. Jackie only laughed and they went in the gym.

When Star came in, she went for the podium area. There was the podium (duh), the projector and presenter screen thingy-mah-bob, and a microphone. She found the principal and told him that she had something she had to share with the school, which he looked a little uneasy at.

"It's a good message regarding the Recycling Contest we had last week. And how I think we can do more." After she said that, she was allowed on the stage.

She looked over by the exit, where two students were. Both had the file and the other had the switch. She nodded at them.

Once they were gone, Star decided to grab a quick drink of punch. She hurried on over there and was surprised to see Starfan13.

"Hi, Star!" She hugged her. Star jumped a little, startled, but hugged back.

But by the time they were about to start a convo, the students were ready. She looked back at Starfan13, giving her a nervous smile.

"I'll see you later, okay?" Star said.

Starfan13 nodded.

Star rushed to the podium, and grabbed the microphone. She nodded at the students, who nodded at her. They threw the switch to her, and she caught it. She turned back to the audience.

People started to quiet down and whisper. Star's nerves were about to rattle her.

 _You can do this_ , she said to herself.

"Boys and girls, I have a special surprise for all of you." Star grinned. "It's about my friend.

My awesome, super cool friend, Jackie Lynn Thomas." She pointed at her.

The audience turned to Jackie, who was both shocked and shy, which was unlike her. They applauded and her shyness went away.

They turned their attention back to Star.

"Ladies and gentleman, I-" But something hit her. A conscience.

She looked to Marco in the crowd, who's eyes screamed shocked, interested, and excited. He couldn't wait to know. But she couldn't.

So she told them that she said she was sorry for being a little mean to both Marco and Jackie in the car. Publicly apologizing, like in the movies.

She she apologized to Marco for being a jerk the entire week.

She left, dashing in the bathroom, tears in her eyes.

She couldn't do it.

And about 15 minutes in the stall that she was in, she was buried knee deep in toilet paper, alone. Absolutely alone.

She heard a knock.

"Knock, knock." Said a familiar voice. "Star, you in there?"

She didn't answer.

Starfan13 frowned, looking around. She then knocked again. "Listen, Star, I know what you planned to do. I heard. I saw. And I just want you to know that I-"

Within seconds, Star burst out of the stall. She hugged Starfan13, crying and crying. She told her the whole story.

And when she stopped crying, she explained it further.

"I just.. felt bad. Jealousy just got the best of me. I'm a terrible friend. I don't deserve to be with Marco." Star sniffed and pulled a piece of toilet paper from the stalls.

Starfan13 frowned. She tilted Star's chin.

"Oh, cheer up, Star. Of course you do. Your Star Butterfly. How else could Jackie beat you to the guy of your dreams?" Starfan13 half-smiled and tilted her head. "Star?" She followed Star's eyes.

Star was looking back at the dance floor, where it was lit up. Everyone was dancing. She managed to find Jackie and Marco, who were dancing together with Janna. It looked like fun.

She turned back. "Of course I don't."

"Because?"

She looked back at the trio.

"Because I'm not Jackie Lynn Thomas."


	6. Talking About Stuff: A Wednesday Rant

**_Okay, fellas. Real talk._**

 ** _So, was today a good day or what? Spider-Man homecoming. Yuri On freaking Ice- w/victuuri and yurio w/ his new friend and all that Jazz! HAIRSPRAY LIVE!_**

 ** _I'm pretty sure some for you aren't interested in any of these, but this week was lit, okay?_**

 ** _(If you want the link to Hairspray Live or YOI ep 10, just hmu friendo)_**

 ** _Anyhoodle, it gives me an idea: YOI fanfic or nah? Message me your ideas._**

 ** _Also this chapter was written within 20-30 minutes. Pretty fast and pretty ugly (in my opinion, lmao.) The drama will pick up by the chapter and as more shit happens._**

 ** _Thanks for all your love, talk to me about anything, byeee!_**

 ** _-Samira_**


	7. IMPORTANT

**iM SO SO FREAKING SORRY. I MOVED! i won't be posting fics here as much, and I may or may not finish this one, since I'm occupied with another series I'm writing rn. Until then, check out my page** **and leave me kudos since I am thirsty for attention**


	8. GUESS WHOS BACK BACK AGAIN

GUYS GUYS GUYS IM BACK AND IM SO SORYR LIFE IS CRAZY BUT IM BACK AND ILL FINISH IT I PROMISE ILL FINISH TODAY IF NOT TOMMOROW. I SWITCHED FANDOMS A BIT AND BECAME OBSESSED WITH PHAN BUT IM STILL HERE AND THE STORY SILL BE FINISHED EXTREMELY SOON.


	9. Attempt 5

"I miss Star."

Marco paced around his room, thinking. It was a day after the dance, he had gone looking for Star, abandoning Jackie with a simple "I'll see you later" with no answers. No explanation. She took it to be rather rude and crossed her arms, as he could tell from the corner of his eye. He felt a bit bad, but Star is what mattered at the moment. He was her main priority.

He couldn't really tell why, though.

He could sense Star's romantic feelings, her aura, from the way she's been acting lately. The distancing, the pacing, and um okay- he overheard her conversation with Glossyrick. He was just curious, and a tad overprotective after all. And it might have caught on him, 'cause whenever he thinks of Star, the friendship shell around her name suddenly crumbled and was replaced by a mushy love heart. Unfamiliar, but a good feeling that he couldn't describe.

Maybe that little love heart was there all along, and those little skips of the heart were ignored and were taken for feelings towards Jackie, that maybe he lost along the way.

Maybe.

"I don't understand."

He sat on his bed, his lips letting out a exasperated sigh. "Love is complicated. Maybe things would've been different for me if Star never had come to Earth. Don't get me wrong, she's impacted my life in ways I would've never expected. I love her, but-"

And there it is.

Suddenly, Marco's eyes shot open. His confectionary skin stiffened and his legs felt as if they were to melt into the ground like chocolate on a warm day. He prayed for Star to not have listened, but the blonde curl peeking out of the bedroom door said otherwise. Then her pair of eyes, wide as well. She didn't expect this at all.

He loves Star Butterfly. Princess of Mewni, future air to the throne. His best friend. He loves her. He didn't understand how- or why- these feelings decided to randomly bubble up, but they have.

He remembers the time he saw who he had to guide around on their first day on Earth.

He remembers who he saved from a legion of alien monsters out to attack her.

He remembers who he had fought alongside all the battles he's won, all the enemies he's come across.

He remembers her.

And it's all too sweet and nice and gooey and mushy and lovey-dovey when he sees her trudge over to him, open the door with trembling hands, and place her lips on his caramel cheeks.

"You-I-we-" It's strange.

"Funny how I fell in love with an earthling. How are we gonna make this work when I leave for Mewni?" Star chuckles, and it's a tinkle of fairy chimes.

"Star, I-"

"I can't believe you like me." Her eyes lit up, brighter than the nearest star. She was glowing.

"S-star-"

"You like me-"

"STAR!"

"W-what?"

He took a deep breath, staring deep into her eyes, knowing he was about to regret his words. "I-you-you weren't meant to hear that."

Star's raised shoulders slumped, and the twinkle in her eye turned into more of a burnt lightbulb, or a broken one, the shards scattered around her iris. "I don't understand-"

"And neither do I. I was so used to being friends, and I do like you, and now I realize that. But I'm not ready for... whatever this is. I'm not ready at all."

His eyes cast down to the floor.

"You don't deserve this. You don't deserve a nerdy kid that wears stupid orange sweatshirts and does dumb karate and it's a complete and utter coward. You don't deserve a loser. You don't deserve me. You deserve a handsome prince. Or a flamboyant jock. But not... me."

He stood up, and left the room. "I'll see you later, Star. I'm going to go to a friend's house."

"Okay." Star whispered, but it was mostly towards herself.

One week later, they sat on the couch together, and she felt brave enough to show Marco her journal. All her adventures. All her secrets.

"Everything." Star marveled the pages with a smile.

A head on his shoulder, popping nachos into each other's mouths.

A shared moment. All it took was 4 attempts.

And about 7 more, but those were never taken into action, and maybe they shouldn't have. Because if they weren't, this wouldn't have happened. And this feeling wouldn't have soared through them, locked in their heads

Twelve different times.


End file.
